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How To Sit on His Face

Face sitting or Smothering (also known as Queening) is basically when you use a submissive’s face for a seat cushion. It can be as basic as allowing him to sniff you through your garments to as complex as toying with his air supply as he tongues your pussy and/ or asshole. In any event, there is a right and wrong way to do this so you don’t end up bruising his face or breaking his nose (although some guys really like that!).

Setting the Mood

First thing you want to remember - Men are visual creatures. Facesitting is about using your feminine parts to seduce and control him. It’s a good idea to stand over him and let him get an eyeful of your crotch and butt cheeks before you sit. I like to put my hands on my hips or touch myself as I tell them what I’m going to do to their face before I sit, for example; it builds anticipation. It helps to get them excited about the prospect of having their vision obscured if you give them some visual teasing beforehand.

Know Your Purpose

What your goal for sitting on his face? It seems like a silly thing, but if you think about it there are many different reasons why a women would sit on a man’s face. Do you want to restrict his air supply or smother him? Do you want to allow him to kiss your ass or worship you? Do you want him to lick your parts or orally service you? Do you want to see what’s going on under there or do you just not care? Each of these require a different sitting style.

What Does He Want?

Different men enjoy face sitting or smothering for different reasons. Some men want to be used as a seat cushion; others want to be able to smell your fragrance. Some want to be able to lick your parts while other just want the pressure of your weight on their face, crushing them and making them struggle (full weight facesitting). A marriage of what you want and what he wants will make for a great time for both of you. Of course, if he wants something that you’re just not into, it’s good to tell him what you want & see if he’s willing to compromise. You’ll find that with most men, half a loaf is better than none at all.

Things to Consider

Think about his face carefully. Does he have lots of stubble? That may be uncomfortable for you to sit on for full weight (but no big deal if he’s licking you).  Wear something to cover your crotch and upper thighs to avoid chafing.

Avoid wearing denim or other hard fabrics. They can really cause abrasion to his face and the seams are known to cause damage to tender faces. And all faces should be treated with tenderness

Does he have a prominent nose? It may be a problem for men with long noses to breath if his nose is up your ass while he tongues you. It may also be very uncomfortable for him if your full weight comes right down on his nose, particularly if you’re facing forward with your pubic bone right on his nasal bones, or if you’re using him as a human cushion. Again, some men like that, but let’s assume the average guy into facesitting doesn’t enjoy the prospect of a broken nose. 

Ask about his medical history. Is he asthmatic? It’s not impossible for an asthmatic to partake of facesitting but it’s important to be on the lookout for signs of distress and have his inhaler very close by. Stop the scene if you have to. Men won’t tell you when they’re not doing well because they never want the fun to end; sometimes as submissives they don’t want to disappoint you. But you have to always remember your obligation to play safe, sane and responsible.

I don’t have to tell you, but I’ll say it anyway (I can’t assume you all have boyfriends); examine his face for any signs of open or healing sores. Look for any signs of trauma or broken skin near or on the mouth and nose. Have him open his mouth an look around. If you have any doubt, don’t do it; don’t think because you’re wearing a panty or shorts that you can’t get something. Always protect yourself.

Now, How To Sit

Remember when I wrote about the importance of being physically fit? Well, this is one of those times where it counts. You can’t just plop down on a face as if it’s an actual seat, no matter what he says. The human face was not designed to withstand the pressure of an entire torso’s weight. You have to counter balance with your legs and arms in order to exert the right amount of weight that doesn’t cause damage.

1.First thing to do is sit reverse cowgirl, withyour back to his head. (If you do it facing forward you’ll hurt your knees after a while and possibly injure his lower jaw.)

2.Position yourself so your knees are on his shoulders. Not full weight, but enough of it to distribute your weight throughout your legs. Try to avoid platform heels unless you have powerful legs that you can hold yourself upright on; you’ll injure your ankles and getting a comfortable position will be hard.

3.Seat your self on his face so that the softest parts of you are in contact with the hardest parts of his face. So for example, your ass crack and cheeks should center on the nose and upper jaw.

4 Lean forward and use your hands to balance the rest of your weight on his chest. It’s important to lean forward so that he can get some type of air flow to breathe during the play session. The bigger your booty, the more cognizant you should be to lean forward or raise yourself up periodically so he can breathe. 

4a. For licking, you’ll need to raise yourself up. Using your leg strength, balance back more onto your ankles, knees off of his shoulders. This will allow him to move his lower jaw and head freely underneath you to pleasure you properly. You can also just kneel over him and let him reach up and earn that pussy or ass, but know that your knees will eventually start to hurt from being in one position for so long. Also, his neck will eventually give out because it’s not designed to crane, only to pivot.

4b. For full weight facesitting, you can lean back more to restrict the breath, but make sure your softest parts are what you’re smothering him with. The same for a human seat.

(I may make an instructional video to accompany this post)

Be realistic. He may want you to squish his face but good. You have to remember however that you are the dominant and you set the tine for what is safe to do. Squish his face for him if you like, but don’t do it with reckless abandon.


I don’t like to encourage spending money, but if you know you’re just not physically capable of balancing yourself as described, invest in a Queening Chair. I got my little seat from a UK site that had decent prices. They even give you a little history of facesitting. But depending on your budget, there are other places on the net you can get a Queening Chair if you want something larger or more elaborate.

Facesitting is work, but it gets easier once you develop a rhythm and you get used to what you’re doing. You’ll learn what works for you as you gain more experience. Hopefully this guide will give you a good start.

Write me with questions or send me your facesitting success stories or photos!

Filed under advice kink facesittng technique BDSM sex

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